Saturday, August 05, 2006

Sinned!

I'm a grown up now. After being through my worst failure and addiction, I'm a changed person now. I won't repeat my mistakes anymore...I'm a man!

What has happened to me for the last few months? Look at the picture to the left, thats where I was for the past 3 months. Knight Online.
This game was & still will be the best game I've ever played in my entire childhood. I'm a high lvled warrior in a grade 1 clan killing other players during my past time while organizing boss hunts and money gathering with my friends from the US, Canada, Sweden, Philipines & Turkey.

This addiction almost killed my life. I stopped going to the gym, stopped socializing in the Msn/Yahoo/Icq/telephone/skype, and most important of all, stopped studying.
"No study = bad results" rule just doesn't seem to bother with me at all. What I cared was just to gather with my bunch of in-game friends and do so much killing as any kid would have dreamt. Exam results were bad. I lost muscle mass :( and some fats :) , sleep for 4~5 hours a day after all the game & homework have been completed.

It stopped.....my life changed when I saw this:


It happened on a friday while I was having my dinner at 10pm(yes, its that late). What caught me at 1st was the beautiful girl in the drama. Deciding that a drama with pretty girls >> guys in shorts sweating out trying to out-punch each other, I stay tuned to it till the end of that episode. Its a typical Japanese love story where good looking guy falls for a cute girls and vice-versa. The 'catch' is that the girl has XP (Xeroderma pigmentosum) disease and she will die soon. He wasn't 100% in love with her at the time he found this out, and against advises from friends, he did anyway. A guy with all to lose and nothing to gain still goes on with the love has really some guts!

So, what am I doing with my life? I'm not gonna die soon(touchwood), nor am I involved in any love where my gf is gonna die or leave to anywhere. Why am I sitting here in front of my computer where life is limited & anything could happen the next day. I've all to lose & nothing to win from playing this game....this is pathetic! Theres no 'guts' losing everything to this game, this isn't love, well, this isn't anything important at all!

Today, I logged in to my game, told my clannies that I'm leaving for good, and left. For good I hope. I know theres a life for me outside there in this world waiting. May it be my school life, social life, love life, sports life a.k.a gym, I'm gonna go for it! I'm gonna spend time on things that I can feel, touch, hold, enjoy, experience, wise up. I'm in for it! I'm a grown up!
Went to the gym today after a 2~3 month hiatus. Starting my long awaited revision tomorrow.

Btw, the show is called A song to the Sun (タイヨウのうた)
And this is the opening scene:

4 comments:

Kelly said...

while you have released yourself,I'm just sinking myself to drama addiction.I must pull away myself too..Glad to hear your getting 'better'

cl3m` said...

okairi!

reason why i never play online games. it`s d devil`s fruit

jlshyang said...

That show looks nice la, wonder if i can find the pirated version here, kakaka.

mayc said...

hmm.. erm, good luck! thank god u werent kidnapped by martians, just some Knights online.. hahar. welcome back to the real world!